Sample whiskey to check for quality. Take a large bowl, check whiskey again to be sure of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Pour another level cup and drink. Turn on electric mixer and beaf on cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one peaspoon of sugar and beaf again. Make sure whiskey is still ok, cry another fup. Turn off mixer. Break two heggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the bowl of dried fruit. Mix in turner thing. Check whishey. If fruit get stuck in the beafers, pry it loose wit a screwdriver. Sample whiskey again to cheak for tonsisisity. Next, siff two cups of salt of somethin'. Who cares? Check whishey again. Now siff the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one babblespoon of brown sugar of whatever colour you can find. Grease oven. Turn cake pan 350 gredees. Don't forget to beaf of turner. Throw bowl out of window. Cheak wishy and bo tow ged.
Note: A rottle of bum say be a mubstituted for th-the whiskkay, the results rill bill teeemmmin' brilliant